Sunday, May 4, 2008

It's a Baby Shower Times Two

It's a baby shower for some bloggers expecting their second baby, and they're asking some second timers ourselves (or pretty much anyone) to share their best assvice/advice when we were expecting. I actually didn't have a heck of a lot of time to get either one, given that I was 15, yes 15 weeks pregnant when I found out, and my baby was a mere 7 months. Did give up breast feeding that very day, totally guilt free. Most of my friends just laughed and secretly thought I was a dork for not realizing (it's okay, I forgive you). And they all planned theirs out to be two - three years, so I was kind of on my own.

But enough about me, on to the advice. First of all, don't worry if you feel like you're not an expert just because you have two. My husband kept telling everyone it was easier since we remembered everything, hah! After calling the doctor in a panic when he had a rash at 1 month I was told "it's the one month rash, like they explained at your prenatal appt." Oh. But do take advantage if you feel like you can relax a little more. With the first I panicked every time I stepped in the shower, worrying my kid was crying and actually jumping out 3 or 4 times at least. With the second I realized that it's really okay even if a baby does cry, even for the length of a shower.

Also realize the kids can be really different, which can be really fun and interesting. My first hated moving, hated the cradle and would rather play with the rattles with the swing completely still. My second slept amazingly well swinging like a monkey, and was way too wiggly to sleep with us, preferring me to rock him wildly at night. At 4 and 5 they are best buddies, but the differences are still there.

I'm never big on advice, because as the above paragraph shows, kids can be pretty different, but here is one piece I'll pass along. Frankly it's one of the only things I remember from that first year. If you are planning to have them share a room, don't worry that the baby will wake your older one up. I kept big Donovan in the pack 'n play in the kitchen way longer than was necessary, worried his crying/waking at night would wake his older brother up. Never happened, even when he cried or woke up early. And as they got older then spent quality parent sleeping in time "talking" to each other, toddler entertaining baby.

Finally, nothing is going to melt your heart like seeing them hug.

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